itookthepillyougaveme

school. stories. sensations.

recent posts

about

melancholic madness

  • Digital Thread of Transcribed Things
    Di ital Thr ad of Transcr bed Thi gs

    Activity #5- Visual Ventricle

    Symbols are rhetoric. Rigggght. So is everything else. Right.

    Here’s my ‘moodboard’. The intention behind this is rooted in depicting the falsities we are preached as a society. Adherence is only necessary if everyone else adheres. Adhere to some degree to achieve some degree of success. Anyways, that’s irrelevant. Just remember to work hard in high school so you can go to a good university so you can get a good job so you can have a big, pure family so you’re able to lock yourself behind your white picket fence while the world around you burns. It’s simple.

    this is something i drew. it's a dystopian depiction of our world(not so far from today) it shows the pressure of the GRIND, propogated by our industry and popular culture, and how people are starting to wake to the notion that the eternal GRIND might just not be the end all be all.

    Let that seep in. Pure artistic expression. Sheesh.

    I applied both the usage of visual elements such as representation through colour, as well as brief symbol usage(the no sleeping signs).I’d say this is a depiction of a dystopian reality except that is basically how we currently exist. Think about it. Pretty simple isn’t it. Text is utilized in order to make the message more consumable, as well as to plant some propaganda seeds in your little mind. (your mind only exists in relation to this.) The gushing metallic heart of capitalism continues to pump, sending clanker reinforcements anywhere but where they’re needed. Leaches. In paradise. Sucking the life out of you while you smile, clapping your hands in front of your brand new financed (monthly through blackrock subsidiaries) HD colourpop9000™️ 72-inch television set, drooling just a bit onto your pet labubu(which you’re still paying off yet have an insatiable hankering for a new one). Truly, and beautifully content in your squalor. Like a good American. Don’t be ashamed. Go on. Go buy another. Yes, because you want it, sure. Because you can. What else could pacify you if this is your world….. right?

    Nothing’s ever good enough. More. I need more.

  • Digital Thread of Transcribed Things
    Di ital Thr ad of Transcr bed Thi gs

    Blog #6- Crafty Craft

    I’m not going to sit here and say yarn-bombing changed the world.

    Probably because it didn’t. Sure, it’s eye-catching, sure it galvanized some community participation. But did it change anything at all? What’s the point.

    So, I feel it important to preface that these dives into things such as quilting, yarn-bombing, and beadwork must be taken with a grain of salt. Not necessarily the action itself, but the rhetoric that is carved out from them by certain folk. I feel very strongly about making mountains out of molehills, especially in the human rights/social justice warrior/political/moral zone, as it often detracts from the real issue at hand, and disqualifies serious consideration. If you supplement your cause with rhetoric that is blatantly a hot air balloon, you cripple yourself. Here comes the rabbit hole. While public perception is certainly not the end all be all, placing a great deal of emphasis on things that really aren’t, weren’t, and will never be perceived as incredibly instrumental as an effective form of rhetoric is sort of derogatory to the field of rhetorical study. In my eyes, it’s imperative to be precise about what things you entertain and what you simply explore.

    Alrighty I’m done being a cynic. Creative expression is rad. It has been a pivotal factor in many social movements in the past. Specifically, the Prague Spring comes to mind. Very cool expression through publications by local intellectuals, and photographers depicting the local women tease the soviet soldiers. But, what I do like about yarn-bombing, is the ideals it represents. The sort of decentralization of a traditionally domestic craft, taken to the streets. I adhere to the idea that it challenges what precisely it means to be political. Where is the line between expression, and channeled expression? I enjoy that. The whole “making invisible labour visible again” is very poetic, in a sense that transcends the aestheticism of it, bolstering a women’s’ rights issue.

    Rhetoric extends to participation in making things; crafts. I adore the community that stems from these crafts, and is able to blossom due to the action it fosters within a group of people, or in relation to an idea. We are invited to engage together. I firmly believe the world cannot have too much of that. At the very least, I know we need more. Check this shit out.

    trees yarn-bombed.

    Pretty cool, huh? Wanna see another. Yea. Yeah you do. Here’s a few. Revel in it. Yarn. On things.

    tree trunk yarn bombed. bull statue yarn bombed.

    So I mean, it looks dope. Almost effervescent. It didn’t foster any major contributions to historical decisions. But it did incite discussion, whether it was relevant or not is a different thing. However, it did bring minorities together. It did light up ideas, blooming from the twisted myriad of coloured yarns. It certainly caught your eye. That’s for sure. And maybe that’s okay, because any publicity is good publicity….right?

  • Digital Thread of Transcribed Things
    Di ital Thr ad of Transcr bed Thi gs

    Blog #5- Communication Control

    Here we are, floundering in yet another rhetorical medium. Lovely. We’re back to third spaces: the cigarette stained stoops, the pavilion amongst the felled oak trees; those spaces in which existence is less so guided, and more so encouraged. Except now, they’re magazines. Zines, to be specific. These are basically small-form printed written works, often including visual elements, sort of pocket books for the people if you will.

    Upon exploring a few zines on the internet archive, I was not convinced they can be considered third spaces within themselves. I’d say that they can be a very useful medium for circumventing constricting idealisms, but they’re a medium. There is no reflected discourse within them exactly, it’s the discourse that exists around them in the communities they help curate. One could say, well third places in general are just a medium. The place is just a place until you define the place. And I would have to agree. So, I suppose there is essence in claiming them as a place for conversation. For expression. An extension of the imagination if you will. I suppose the main issue is interacting with them digitally. I’d hope for some sort of chat feature or digital discussion room, as that would complete the third place definition for me. Zines are akin to posters, to songs, to notes scribbled then tucked into the drawer of International. They are simply another means to an end.

    That being said I do dig some of Licona’s sentiments regarding imagination as within the realm of positive application. That it is indeed productive to endorse one’s imagination, that it transcends escapism. It’s a nice thought, with a lot of truth to it. Among explored zines was the Warrior Crowd Control and Riot Manual . It was neat. Here’s a little taste for you.

    a zine showing how to use riot control grenades, and how to combat them. It also shows the types of grenades- M7A3 CS, and M25 CS

    Tear gas types mainly utilized by police and military are detailed. One smells like apple blossom, one smells like pepper. Both will make you cry.

    While I feel someone could consume any type of media and be receptive to it, depending on both the topic at and, and their interest in it, I have enjoyed the images in these zines. The sort of pamphlet feel makes for a bit more of a hands-on vibe. Very effective for spreading rhetoric. I can already picture an “Earth First” zine in detail; Erika facing down bulldozers in Northern Arizona. Straight out of Hayduke Lives!

    I still don’t think zines are really third places(my earlier logic says otherwise) but I can understand and appreciate the niche they fill in spreading rhetoric, especially within marginalized movements or for more guerilla sectors, which they seem to be perfectly suited for. Dropping little zine manifestos from the sky. Soon enough. Sound familiar?

  • Digital Thread of Transcribed Things
    Di ital Thr ad of Transcr bed Thi gs

    Blog #4- Charismatic Cabal

    It’s important to define what we will be referring to when the term “culture” is used. That is, what it means in this context. Culture is dynamic, not static. It exists more so as a vector for people, politics, economics, geographies, that sort of stuff. Its constantly evolving in relation to these factors, dependent on which is more adjacent at any given time. So, to preface this, let’s try to paint over our own stagnation. Or we can continue to hold terms up upon their false stability. Easier that way.

    So, let’s go up in my little reality that is deemed to be real. Workplace culture is an idea, that can be static in it’s normative definition, yet is still constantly evolving and being bent to align with specific jobs, employees, times of day. All factors, right.

    A certain level of something is expected of establishments in general. Of course, that is why people attend, as they endorse some of the ideals that the business intends to portray. When one pops out for a cheeky beverage, they gravitate towards whatever vibe they want to be pushed to embody, whatever scene they want to peruse, they immerse themselves in it. Service is dripping with cultural cues. Everything from decor to the music played. So here’s the story.

    At the bar. The one tourists go to. Where pretty girls go with pretty girls, where pretty girls take their dates. So there he was, existing on his little stage behind the sweeping curve of the granite countertop Whether he liked it or not, he was on display. New Couple at B11/12. The immediate unconscious, yet somehow mandatory profiling of them had begun. “Y’all know what you’d like to get started with?” Mhm. “Gin or Vodka. Right, do we have preference? Swell, straight up, dirty, or perfect?” Filthy. Will he put it on a leash? Of course. Dry? Extra Dry? “Would you like that up, or on a big rock?” Twists of citrus, olives, different types of olives. Pick your poison. Swell. That’s just one drink.

    Patron’s personal preferences communicate identity. Of course, only to some degree. What is frivolous to someone, can be a shower of information to him. And vice versa. Cocktails are a fascinating way of pigeonholing people. Nothing uttered says so much. Too much uttered also says a lot.

    Milagro. Silver. Neat.

    Ah, no lime.

    “Tracks”

    People are always so taken aback, insulted even. Especially when they’re correctly profiled. Fuming because they know they look like they drink well bourbon. Double. Neat. Every time. That’s the thing. Pattern recognition isn’t sadistic. It’s inherently human. His brain is trained to identify reoccurring instances and map them out so he can predict and anticipate similar instances into the future. It’s evolution. Beverages are a great example of how items can be seen as status symbols. A martini becomes more than a drink, it’s an expression of what that individual wants to portray. When it boils down to it, formatting presumptions is part of his job. People want to be told what they want when they’re unsure. They want to be interpreted correctly. It’s human to want to be understood, even on a level that’s perceived as superficial. It’s all still a part of who they are.

    He gets his own language too. However minimal. Sharp. Behind! Heard that. Five all day.

    Blabbering perfunctories spewed from his coworkers on the regular. The weight that becomes placed upon things not due to their importance, but simply due to their consistence presence. Abhorrently engaging when you do exist in that world. He opted to 86 that shit.

    Such things began to seep into his life, the one he carried externally. Prioritization of a profession that fueled him, yet was only a step in the staircase to something better. The flashing colour, so bright and oh so animated was lifestyle it pushed upon him, yet he knew how it burned. When he looked at his friends who were gradually driving themselves into the ground, using this industry of service as their vessel, there was no envy in his eyes. What he truly wanted lied outside of the madness and beauty of alcohol adjacent professions. And it became important to remember, to remind himself, of what he said to bar guests on the regular.

    “Hey man, I just work here.“

  • Digital Thread of Transcribed Things
    Di ital Thr ad of Transcr bed Thi gs

    Activity #2:Serial Sauntering

    static structures are out. living rhetorical environments are in. let it be known.

    City planners design the “grammar” of the city. However, it is written by those who immersively interact with it and it’s many facets, perhaps creating new aspects of such things; fabricating new facets.

    The view from above drastically contrasts the inferior view of us humans, ants milling about in a mess made by ourselves. I strive to disrupt the grid, hard as it may be. Every minuscule interaction within the grid is a small resistance, a jab in order to jive. Moseying through this infrastructure, I do my very best to finagle obtuse routes that contradict the intended planned routes. this is imperative to detangle oneself from the Man. Futile, sure, of course. Necessary? Yes. Whilst walking is an enjoyable activity, I firmly believe in it as a mode of transportation, not a singular action. There are always reasons to walk, yet one does not walk simply to walk. Tis’ a means to an end. Even if I “Walk to Walk” there is always an alterior motive, for buffing of one’s mental or physical prowess. It is such a blessing to be able to reside in a place(my house) that is walkable(relatively) in terms of American cities. Oh, to be a European. Cars killed our cities. It’s all automotive propaganda, political rhetoric to fuel the machine and keep the general population dependent on a $40,000 mode of transportation. Just to survive.

    “A strategy is the calculation of power relationships that becomes possible as soon as a subject with will and power can be isolated”. Walking can be seen as symbolic I suppose. Organized meetings come to mind. Communal refuge and change through bipedal action. Beautiful, sunny day to get somewhere, innit?

  • Digital Thread of Transcribed Things
    Di ital Thr ad of Transcr bed Thi gs

    Blog #3: Gamification of Everything

    Every digital interface is lilted with components designed to engage every sense of it’s user, to drag them in and maintain their control, doing the most to avoid relinquishing their grasp on your psyche. Attention is time, time is power. The clankers have obtained our most valuable resource with such an efficiently constricting grasp.

    Now, pivoting back to the realm of De Certeau. If interaction with your environment(in this case walking) lets us bend space in small acts of resistance, playing a video game can feel similar—sometimes finding hacks, sometimes being utterly strangled by it’s design. Either or, it’s evident that the power retained through agency isn’t purely an abstract concept. Submerged in stoplights, lurking in street names, even harbored in controller buttons. Or this keyboard. In my mind it’s difficult to escape the notion that we are all slaves to the technology we benefit so dearly from. A leach to both ourselves and this world.

    I personally never play video games. I never possessed a system when I was younger, nor did my friends. This resulted in my never figuring out how to use a controller properly. Due to that, I still avoid playing them today. Admittedly, I despise the things. My hatred for video games is seated in my upbringing, my ecocentric mentality, the ideals that being outside and active will always be better. For you, and for your reality. Not to mention that your tangible interaction with the world IRL will always be closer to being real in my mind. Of course, it’s all just a differing of views within an infinite amount of constructs, so it doesn’t really matter. I can appreciate what video games can do for certain individuals. Complete creation of their own world, utilizing their own rhetoric to craft an entity that means something to them.

    a film photograph I took of a young lad getting cuffed on the sidewalk, shirtless, and liquored up.

    Go get drunk and watch shirtless kids get arrested for engaging in a liquor-fueled jousts instead of sitting in your basement. As with everything, this is purely my opinion, my interpretation of my world.

  • Digital Thread of Transcribed Things
    Di ital Thr ad of Transcr bed Thi gs

    Activity #1:Digital Demons

    Messing With WordPress. Here are my findings.

    After dutifully meandering through WordPress’s labyrinth of prefabricated options — toggling templates, recalibrating palettes, embedding the occasional image(with varying formatting success), as well as messing around with hyperlinks, my website is still not where I envision it to be. Of course, the main barrier here is hours dedicated. The exercise wasn’t necessarily invigorating, yet had to be done.

    The flaunted “ease” of the platform proved paradoxical. Such features enable superficial coherence, yet also ossified the site’s architecture. This is my primary quarrel with the site. It’s so “simple” in some cases that it becomes counterintuitive. My gestures toward personalization were ham stringed by the template’s insistency- a veneer of choice masking the inevitable crash out and logout of the site .

    Tham’s discussion materialized visibly in this aspect: convenience is purchased at the cost of rhetorical sovereignty. Only through these small aggravations did his recommendations feel less abstract. I can now manipulate the site with marginally greater dexterity, though it remains evident the templates’ control over my personal rhetoric. Clanker. I continue to lose myself in the “professional styles” or whatever that aren’t available for for viewing by the general WordPress population. This can be attributed to me folding and purchasing my domain name. Suckered into yet another digitized subscription with promises of personal agency, losing my financial integrity with it. Classical.

  • Digital Thread of Transcribed Things
    Di ital Thr ad of Transcr bed Thi gs

    Activity #3: Twine

    https://drive.google.com/file/d/1-SYaeELBk1G7wldOyneCyjbpYZRpwENN/view?usp=sharing

    There is my twine game. Not sure if this post is supposed to have extra goodies or not.

    Play my game and let your world be forever, inexplicably, inextricably altered.

  • Digital Thread of Transcribed Things
    Di ital Thr ad of Transcr bed Thi gs

    Blog #2

    Rhetoric and Capitalism, along with other things.

    “a domain of financially mediated and professionalized practices centered on advertising, public relations, and the means of mass communication” – Jodi Dean on politics today.

    anxiety over agency: the attachment of rhetorical agency to a vision of political change

    ”capitalism codes bodies and meanings into systems of surplus value”- Matthew Bost

    Agency can be thought of as an individual’s ability to navigate, create, and dissuade constructs in relation to their surroundings. This all stems from one’s rhetoric which they have created consciously or unconsciously. This is imperative to an individual’s existence. To me, your agency is all you have, it embodies your ability to acquire resources you need, or propagate information you find important. This also applies to distributed agency, as personal agency is utilized to navigate distributed. Distributed agency is created by a myriad of personal agencies. Agency is not, and cannot necessarily be completely static. It’s also constantly evolving, which one could say reflects contemporary socio-cultural dynamics. An example of employing agency in my daily life could be ascertaining the most efficient way to do an activity, placing flair upon it to boost personal engagement, then choosing to complete that task in that way from there forward, continuously tweaking it to improve it. Rhetoric is infused within every system, therefore agency is always present as well. Same same.

  • Digital Thread of Transcribed Things
    Di ital Thr ad of Transcr bed Thi gs

    Blog #1

    This is my favourite part. Figuring out how to navigate this interface so bear with me for formatting and overall aesthetic

    Picturing myself as I write: It can be easy to get swallowed by the tortured artist aesthetic, adhering to a stream of consciousness more so than a precise depiction of an analysis. Words which are laced with personal purpose, rhetoric prevalent to one’s identity in favour of a societally set standard. I gravitate towards the tangible utensils when writing. Transcribing rather than typing. Manual, not automatic. The environment that writers curate to create within traditionally holds much gravitas. Different habitats for creation entertain separate models for construction. Alexis digresses that one’s writing identity is influenced by their writing habitat, utilizing the inanimate objects around them. The material culture of writing is an interesting phrase, as it deems spaces and tools artifacts. Historically, I would argue that this used to be of more prevalence than it is today, as today one could say there are less diverse writing environments within the digital age.

    We are of course, all products of our environment, so to dissuade this notion of materiality would be foolish. I can appreciate the stem at the base of the flower, those peculiar methods which cast that much more light upon your work. I’d say this is part of the magic of creative processes, the inclusion or, if anything the inability to exclude the effects of one’s surroundings, is in itself, part of the procedure in itself. For example, writing on a boat in the middle of nowhere exhausted may expel more visceral words, ones alleviated from the usual leash in a more homely environment. It simply does not matter how you curate an environment that boosts your productivity, or loses productivity in its absence; it purely matters that you can curate it. You are your own agent, and that is the magic. 

    Where are we going to go? There is nothing to discuss in this avenue.. It’s all demographic based, we are all products of our environments, it is obvious that our works are shaped by who we embody and what we represent as a person, the only question is how can we sculpt ourselves.